I’m not here to be a part of the old narrative. And neither are you. In this episode, I talk about my purpose, what I’m here to create and why I’m not here to make anyone feel comfortable. I’m here to make you think, break you free from your limiting beliefs and claim the truth of who you are. What are you here to create? I hope this inspires you to own it!
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Intro + Outro Music: Silent Ganges by Maneesh de Moor
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Episode 263 – Why I’m Here To Shake Shit Up with Sahara Rose
By Sahara Rose
Namaste. It’s Sahara Rose and welcome back to the “Highest Self” podcast. A place where we discuss what makes you your soul’s highest evolvement.
Oh my goddess, sister queen, I am so excited to share with you that Rose Gold Goddesses is officially open. We are accepting new members for the most high vibe community on the interwebs and in real life as well. What Rose Gold Goddesses is, is your sacred sisterhood collective. We have our very own app with all types of content to support you on your spiritual journey from all of my master classes, I upload content specifically for Rose Gold Goddesses from manifestation, to launching a podcast, to writing a book, and everything in between to support you on your journey of becoming your highest self.
There are thousands of like-minded women who are there to connect with you whether you want to meet up for a cup of ceremonial cacao, or talk about your dharma, or whatever it is that you need support with at this time Rose Gold Goddesses has got you. Consider it your spiritual gym membership with all things to support you on your journey of becoming your highest self. So you can come join us at rosegoldgoddesses.com. Again, that is rosegoldgoddesses.com and we are soul excited to welcome you in.
If it is your first time listening. Welcome. This is probably going to be a fiery one. And if you’re here all the time, you know the drill. When I have an idea in my mind’s eye that I haven’t even completely formulated yet, but I can feel bubbling up inside of me, it’s like the bubbles in the hot water that’s not quite boiling yet, and I like for it to boil together when we are on this podcast talking cause I can just feel this tension, this desire, this expansion inside of me.
So I’m going to be real with you guys, I was looking… so I’m going to Bali, I’m going to be gone for a month. I was looking at all of the podcasts. I was like, “Damn, there’s a lot of…” cause this podcast comes out twice a week, y’all, so I’m double going with the normal podcast. I have a membership community, Rose Gold Goddesses, I have a mastermind together, We Empress, I just wrote a book, I’m writing a deck, I’m writing a… I do a lot.
So I was looking at all the solo casts, I was like, “Damn, I don’t know if I’m going to do these solo casts anymore.” Like it is so much energy for me and I don’t even know… like I feel like I’ve said so much, and these interviews are do it’s this conversation. My interviews have been going longer and longer. What started with what’s supposed to be 30 minute interviews is now like hour and a half long interviews, so it’s also a lot of my time. And I’ve been doing all of the podcasts before I leave so every single day I’m doing like an hour and a half to two hour long conversations with someone.
I’m like, “I don’t know how I’m going to do these solo casts on top of it. Maybe I’ll just for a while just have the once a week interviews like what most people do.” And then after this interview I just did with Tatiana Ray, which will be out next month, oh god, the fire is under my ass again. Which is like, “Oh, this is why you do what you do.”
So I wanted to share this with you because I truly believe that your highest self will come through without you trying. The moment that we put a confined and expectation on it we stifle our creativity. So for giving myself the option of, you know, I don’t actually have to do a second solo cast every single week, which I’ve been doing for now almost three years. So it’s a lot of content. I mean I think we’re almost at like 300 episodes or something to put out on top of all the monthly workshops I do in Rose Gold Goddesses. So I took that off and naturally, it arose, so never do anything out of force, do it out of inspiration because inspiration is an invitation from your highest self. And it is an invitation that is inviting you forward to share that clarity with others to illuminate their path, and that is what being a guru really is, it’s to illuminate the path for others.
So I was having this conversation and it made me start thinking of just the kinds of people, mentors, teachers, podcast guests that I am excited about that I am drawn to. And, you know, ad the ones that I do that like are not like my complete resonating thing, but they might resonate for other people. I was thinking about like what are… who are the people? What are the things? Who are the friends that I’m really drawn to? And it really gave me a deep amount of clarity on myself. That I am no here to make people feel comfortable. I am not that person that you’re going to sit and cry with for hours. It’s just not me.
And I think a lot of people don’t want to admit that that’s not them because we think that that’s just what a nice person does. But I mean unless you’re like one of my best friends, that’s not me, I’m not here to like be your ra-ra person and like cheer you on for everything you do. Like I will cheer you on with love and invite you to step up to your highest self.
I mean, I will put a bit of a fire under your ass, you know and that is who I am, that is the medicine that I am meant to share to the world. I am not this super sensitive, empath feeler who, you know, wants to eye gaze with you. That is not me. And it’s given me so much freedom and clarity to fully own that. Because I think that we try to, especially as we you know, become more spiritual we try to fit into this box, this bubble of what spiritual people are like. And, you know, we often think of like that healer who’s like picking up on everything and they’re just like so warm, and you know, that kapha like energy.
And for some people that is their complete truth. Some people are here to feel like a warm hug. Like my massage therapist is like the most motherly person I’ve ever met. She is just here to love up on people, and touch them, and hug them, and really just like hold space on that energetic level. She can hold so much energy. And that shit’s not me. Like I’m here to be like, “Okay, what are you working through? Let’s transform that. What are the limiting beliefs holding you back? Let’s look at that.” I’m here to shake shit up, and I’m fully owning that now.
Because the conversations that I want to have are about things that trigger the shit out of people. Even the way I speak is triggering to people. I talk loud, and I talk fast, and I swear, and I don’t fit into any box. Some girl commented she’s like, “You don’t fit in any like anthropological historic figure or something.” I was like, “Damn right I don’t.” No one does! No one is meant to be a regurgitation of someone else. We are all meant here to shake shit up. And some people are going to do it with their boldness, and other people with their sweetness, and all are welcome, all are needed.
But for me, what my medicine really is, is to talk about your triggers—the money, sex, death, past lives, ancestors. All of the things that are fucking triggering for people. And to talk about them ,and to bring them to light, to make them fun, to make you stop feeling guilty. I spent all of my childhood life until I was 23 to 24 years old being ruled by guilt. And it is something I’ll still catch myself being ruled by because I grew up with parents in an ancestral lineage that uses guilt to control people. They’re not doing it out of meanness of their hearts, they don’t even realize they’re doing it, it’s just how the paradigm was.
So I would do things out of guilt. I’d respond to a text. I’d show up at this, I’d do that, I’d do that, and it wasn’t out of a genuine desire. And if something is not bringing you to your highest self, maybe you don’t want to desire it, but it’s bringing you to your highest self, or you’re willing to do it because you know it’s worth it then do it. But if you’re just doing it because you feel like you should do it, because society tells you to do it, because this is just how it’s always been done, that is where I beg you to question.
I’m not here to make people feel comfortable. I’m here to be the example of what is possible for you, but in my own way. I’m not here to be following Sahara Rose, I’m here for you to be the best Aubrey, or Maria, or Rosie, or whatever your name is for you to be your highest vibration. That is what I am truly here for and that’s really what I’ve now noticed that this whole podcast—three years—has been all about. What makes you your highest self and realizing that your highest self is going to be different than someone else’s.
Someone else is a hug, and someone else is a fucking slap in the ass. Both are needed at times. Own it. Sometimes I am a hug too and sometimes I could be something else. But it’s getting out of that expectation of what you’re supposed to be, that is what cripples us, especially in the social media age where we look at ourselves from a third person perspective as the brand. You know, whether you are doing this from a professional level as, you know, growing your social media as an influencer, author, whatever, or if you’re just doing it for fun. You’re still building a personal brand that people are seeing and observing and maybe expecting certain things from. I mean, how many of us have had friends from high school who are like, “You’re changing.” As if that’s a bad thing.
You know, imagine what life would be like if we never changed. Like God, imagine if we all were exactly as we were ten years ago, how much that would fucking suck. So we need to change, change is not something to be ashamed of. We’re not meant to be in everyone’s life forever. Like maybe this episode is like the last episode of mine you’ll ever hear. You’ll see, “This is not really the medicine I need anymore.” That’s fine. Maybe this is the first time and our soul contract together is just beginning. Maybe it comes in and out, and that’s all fine ,and that’s with everything in your life. That’s with friends, that’s with parents, we’ve grown up to see a relationship as stagnant when it is fluid.
You know, your relationship with your parents is going to look very different today than it is as a child, but most of us have not fully allowed ourselves to own that. So because of it, we’re still essentially acting the way that we did as children to our parents, which is putting us in this dynamic that is no longer based on the truth. “Mom wants me to do this. Mom wants me to do that. Dad wants us…” No one can make you do anything.
So I am here really to be the example for that because it has been my biggest journey. It has been my ongoing journey and it has been the thing that has freed me. It has been the thing that has brought me truth. It is the thing that every single day I’m coming more and more home to who I am. Which doesn’t mean I’m changing really, but actually means I’m remembering. I’m remembering who I am because before I had so many cloaks over me of who I was not.
And that’s what happens, that’s what spirituality is, and we don’t… you know, people just say, “Oh, you learn about yourself as you age.” Well, not really, because I know a lot of people who are 50, 60, 70s, 80s, 90s who do not know anything about themselves. And I know people who are eight years old who know everything about themselves. So it’s not really coming with age, it’s coming with awareness. It’s coming with radical self-acceptance. It’s coming from, “Wait, I don’t actually have to do these things I hate. I actually don’t have to go see those friends where it’s an awkward conversation just because we’ve been friends since college. I actually don’t have to work at this job that literally kills me.”
Like there are other options out there. I think we get so stuck in our reality that we forget that no one can make us do anything. The only person that is putting you in a trap and a confinement is yourself. And let me just share what happens on the other side of that. You’re going to ruffle up some feathers. The truth is you’re gonna make people uncomfortable. And most of us are so unwilling to go through that period of uncomfort, of redefining, of redefining roles that we actually stay in a mystifying role.
You know, I really want to repeat that because it was really good. We get stuck in this defined role. So this is how my relationship with my mom always is and we play this role that is actually not us so we actually aren’t stepping into who we are because we’re so busy playing this role. When you’re an actor in your own life, when you take off the mask, who are you? Most people don’t know the truth of who they are. Most people are living a complete illusion, a fabrication. Most people are doing things out of societal conditioning without even understanding that it is societal conditioning. They think it’s out of their own desires. You think that that guilt or that shame is coming from you but it is not. It is not yours to hold because no guilt and shame is yours to hold.
Do you think when you were on a deserted island running around naked eating coconuts that you felt any shame over your body? Do you think that before there were any rules of what marriage was supposed to look like you held any guilt or shame around how you had sex, or how you guys had your date nights, or was there any story around it? Who created that story?
Stories come when groups of people come together and they create collective beliefs. And most of the time in history, modern history, those collective beliefs have been decided by, by the men. And then colonization happened, which made them decided by the white man. In every… India, the Congo, et cetera. So we’re carrying on these beliefs that are based in a patriarchal church that are not even ours. We’re playing these puritanical roles for jobs that don’t exist. It’s like you’re that actor who’s still trying to do like the Charlie Chaplin when no one is watching those kind of movies anymore.
You’re trying to be the perfect wife, and he’s trying to be the perfect husband, you’re trying to be the perfect daughter, and they’re trying to be this… and those roles don’t exist. So when we let go of the confines and the constructions, and I think for some people right now this is going over their heads and that’s fine. And for some people right now this is hitting home and maybe it’s going to take you coming back to this later too.
But when we let go, like when we really look first of all at every belief that we hold, you know, I remember when I was 23 and I was so deeply wanting to write this book on Ayurveda to modernize it to the world, but I held so much fear. How was I ever going to make money doing it? How was it going to work? What if I fail? And then of course my parents were telling me that I was definitely going to fail. So I didn’t really have a, you know, an example of a success story. So because of that, I was constantly going back and forth towards are they right? Am I going to fail? Am I selfish for choosing my own path? I should feel guilty because my parents did so much for me and here I am not being the daughter that they signed up for.
Do you see how ridiculous that sounds? You know, you don’t have a kid for them to fit the role that you want. You know, maybe you have a kid with an expectation, but you can’t control them. Parents out there, you know you can’t control your kids. And all the sons and daughters out there, you know that their parents cannot control you but we’re still living with this umbilical cord that is attaching us. And it’s making us think that we are limited in our decisions, we’re limited in what’s possible for us based off of what has been previously regurgitated to us. And it’s regurgitated because it’s not coming from them it’s coming from someone else.
And this comes in everything, you know, in this podcast I talk about all of the things from money and your money mindset. You know, I receive messages from people, “Oh, money is not… money does not buy you happiness. You should not be teaching people that they should be going after money. Like going after money is wrong.” It’s like, “Mm, okay, so explain to my landlord how I’m going to pay my rent in love and light because I’m spreading love and light and that’s what I’m receiving in return. I should definitely not get money because what I’m doing is helping people.”
I did a whole podcast about that last week on adapting an abundance mindset really diving deep into that, but what are those money blocks even coming from? It’s not coming from that person selling you that message, it’s coming from their core wounds. It’s coming from whatever their parents told them as children, which is coming from whatever experience their parents went through. Maybe it was a famine that happened to your great-great-great-grandparents that created the belief that you will never have enough money and you will never be safe. And that belief has been trickling on up to that person who feels so uncomfortable when it comes to money that they are regurgitating and spewing the anger that came from their great-great-great-grandparents.
This is why it’s so important to know our family history, our ancestral history, because we think that we’re just like these clean slates born and we’re not. You know, I was just speaking with Tatiana Rey who’s on the podcast, but I really liked this analogy she made that you are the teabag, and you have been brewing in this pot of water. And all of the herbs et cetera that are inside of you are coming out into this tea. So, really you are the tea, and the teabag are your ancestors, your family, the beliefs, society, all of that. So here we are right now as these tea bags. We can’t take back what herbs that we came to this world with.
But we can strain some shit, we can choose what we want to take forward with us, and what we do not. You know, maybe I really like that my father taught me to be really aware of money so I’m going to take that. But maybe I don’t like how he taught me the scarcity of it. Maybe I like how my mom always told me to really respect and honor my body, but I don’t like how she told me that I have to be a virgin until I got married otherwise no one will ever marry me.
It’s things like that you have to pick and choose, you can’t take the word as the word is. Otherwise you are not going to be an original sovereign being. You are not here to just be, you know, a smoothie of your parents. You’re here to bring in some new ingredients to the smoothie bowl. You’re here to bring in some adaptogens, and some super foods, and some things that did not exist at the time of banana milkshake. Because we know that bananas and milk are improper food combining, so why would we want to be a banana milkshake? You know, so we’re living our lives like banana milkshakes. We were meant to be adaptogenic smoothies with ingredients that that world had not heard of.
So this is really my purpose and this is really my dharma, especially at the moment, and it’s the red thread that I really have been doing but now I’m really just like putting it into words that I am here to shake shit up. I’m here to be a walking duality. I’m here to be misunderstood. I’m here to be spiritual goddess worship Lakshmi channeling ascendant masters connected to the earth wisdom writing spiritual books, giving spiritual talks, writing oracle card decks, connected to spirits, Akashic record channeler. And I’m here to twerk, I’m here to DJ, I’m here to make it rain at the club—the ecstatic dance sober club. Cause I’m also here to not drink. You know, walking duality again. I’m here to not do drugs. I don’t do any kind of drug at all. I’ve never even done plant medicine like ayahuasca in my life. I have done shrooms, which I liked the experience of, and it’s not something I feel like I need.
So I’m here to be that duality because you can try to put me into this picture, and that picture, and that picture. I’m here to be a business woman and host master minds, and speak at talk master minds with literal everyone is a millionaire, they are taking business advice from me. And I’m here to work in downtown L.A. with the children who literally go to sleep at night listening to gunshots teaching them how to take care of their bodies, teaching the girls the first time what their menstrual cycles are. I’m here to be all those things.
Who can take away form me what I can be? Who can put me in a box when I refuse to fucking be in one? And that is what you’re here to do too. You are here to create your own box. You are here to shake shit up. You are here to be a walking duality. Every single person is. You might not have owned what it is, and I was going to say figured out, but you know it. You know why you’re a walking duality but you haven’t owned it yet. You’re still keeping that part of you a secret. You’re still afraid of people finding you out. You’re still afraid of, “Well they take me seriously? Or this or that.” It’s in the closet, it’s your secret.
Okay, you know what I’m talking about. And if you don’t, what is the thing you don’t want people to know about you? What is the thing that right now if you were on this podcast you would definitely not want me to ask you about? Maybe it’s the fact that, you know, you need to smoke weed every single night to fall asleep? Maybe it’s the fact that you keep cheating on your partners. You’re not really sure if this whole monogamy thing is for you. Maybe it’s the fact that you never finished high school. Maybe it’s the fact that you feel like a complete imposter. Maybe it’s the fact that you feel like a total nerd. Whatever it is that you feel ashamed of that you would not want spoke on a podcast that is the thing for you to claim, to integrate, and to run with. That is your magic sauce. That is your good shit. That’s your good juju. That’s bubble up, bubble up, bubble up.
Do you think I would have even talked like that when I was starting my Ayurveda career four years ago? Do you think I would have said bubble up, bubble up, bubble up on a podcast? I hadn’t even been on a podcast. The first times I pitched to a podcast before I had one were right when my book “Idiot’s Guide to Ayurveda” were coming out, which was in August of 2017, which is not that fucking long ago, okay? Before that in 2016 and all before that I was under the poverty line. I literally wasn’t making $13,000 a year, which is what the single person poverty line is in the state of California. I was on Obamacare, I lived with my grandparents. I was a health coach, but I didn’t really have many clients. And I was writing my Ayurveda book that every publisher I tried to pitch it to either didn’t respond or rejected. I ended up getting rejected by 30 different publishers.
So please don’t put that privilege shit on me cause I’m definitely not. Well, I am because I’m a human on earth and we’re all privileged, but I was literally on poverty. And then I decided to believe in myself. Not fully, I didn’t fully, but I decided to let my beliefs be louder than my doubts. And that gave me the courage to write my book, and to write my next book, and to keep going, and to keep going. And sometimes I was so scared. Especially the nights before “Idiot’s Guide to Ayurveda,” “Eat Feel Fresh” came out, I was so scared. I was scared of the haters. I was scared of, “What does this girl think she’s doing? Modernizing Ayurveda? She’s not a doctor. She’s not a wizard. Who is she to modernize Ayurveda? We like it just as it is.”
For some reason those people, Sally from Idaho who took Ayurveda 101, was very triggered by me. For some reason I was letting her interrupt my sleep. Sounds ridiculous now, but it was a real deal situation. I would talk to people, “how do you deal with the haters? How do you deal with this?” And it was real and I give myself full like ability to feel that fear, and I give you full permission to feel that fear because it feels very real for you at this moment.
Until you realize it’s an illusion. Until you realize it’s a bullshit story that someone passed along to you that you’ve been holding onto as your own, and now you can get rid of it. It’s like I’ve been carrying around this suitcase of other people’s stuff, and then I look at it, and I’m like, “Wait, none of this is originally mine. It doesn’t even fit me. I don’t even like it. Why am I carrying this around?” That is what it’s like.
And people tell me, my own mother tells me, “You’re so loud, you’re hysterical. You’re an exhibitionist. You’re this. You’re that.” And now I can really look at that and understand that I’m not her. I can understand why someone could even see me like that. And I have understanding for it, but I also am not gonna let it ruin my life. I’m also really not gonna hold space for it. I think a lot of us we hold so much space for our criticisms and we don’t hold space for our successes. We don’t hold space for authenticity. If I criticize you, you will take that shit to heart. If I complement you, you let that fall onto the floor.
So choose to roll with what empowers you. Choose to be a walking duality. Choose to shake shit up. Choose to be paving the path towards the new paradigm. Because frankly, we don’t need anymore sheeple. Frankly, we’ve had a lot of people following the norms. And I do think we need them in our society. We definitely do. But if you’re listening to this podcast this long, if you’ve not pressed the stop or next button yet, I think you’re here to shake shit up too. Thank you so much for listening, so much for being here. I’m excited to connect with all of you.
I have my membership community Rose Gold Goddesses, which is essentially the highest vibe place on the internet. We have our very own app with 2,000-plus spiritual women coming together to talk about shit like this. Like if you’re like, “I’m looking for my tribe of people who want this, who want to bridge the new paradigm, who want to be walking dualities, and examples of what is possible for others. Like this is what I want. My soul is resonating with this right now. I don’t even know how it starts. I don’t know anyone doing it.”
Join Rose Gold Goddesses. Head over to rosegoldgoddesses.com. The link is in the show notes. We have opened doors again very briefly right now, so head over there, you’ll see all the information, it’s super low ticket because this is like my… you know, I put so much love and so much effort into it, and it’s like my passion, you know. And bringing women together in this way to be that spiritual uprising, that spiritual badass fucking uprising, whoo, it gives me chills. So head over to rosegoldgoddesses.com and I’m looking forward to seeing you there.
If you loved this episode, I would love if you could leave me a review in the iTunes store, and as a free gift, I will share with you the first half of my unreleased book “Eat Right For Your Mind Body Type.” Simply email a screenshot of your review over to email@example.com. Again, sahara, S-A-H-A-R-A, @eatfeelfresh.com and I will send you over the first half of my unreleased book, “Eat Right For Your Mind Body Type.” Thank you and Namaste.
Episode 263 – Why I’m Here To Shake Shit Up with Sahara Rose